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Five Questions

Saturday, 30 March 2019 23:20

We all want great relationships.  No one says, I do, dreaming of a mediocre marriage, but unfortunately many couples find themselves in a crisis not knowing how they got there, much less how to fix what is not working between them.

The good news is, it is never too late to start again and reset your marriage.  Phillipians 3:13-14 (NIV) tells us, Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.

Here are five questions that can help determine if you marriage is heading in the wrong direction as well as some practical steps you can take to reset your relationship today.

  1. Do you spend very little time with your spouse during the week?

Marriages need time —intentional time.  If you find that you have very little time with each other, start today —pray together, have coffee in the morning together, take a walk together.  The more time you spend together, the stronger your relationship will be.

  1. Has your husband become job-centered while you have become child-centered?

Once we get married and have kids, we tend to turn towards our expected roles as providers and/or caregivers.  Don’t.  God created us for so much more.  He called us to be husbands and wives.  Nurture those identities. Celebrate them.  Discover all of God’s potential for your life and your marriage.

  1. Do you talk mostly about schedules and to-do’s?

It’s easy to get focused on the immediate agendas, but don’t overlook going deeper.  Make time for intentional conversation where you can unpack the emotions of the day, share your hopes, dreams, and sorrows with each other.

  1. Do you and your spouse seem to make everything else a priority other than your relationship?

We all do it.  Our kids need us and it feels impossible to spend time doing anything other than being and doing everything for them.  The time you give prioritizing your relationship will bless your kids significantly more than making sure they are at every soccer practice.

  1. Do you feel like you and your spouse have drifted apart and are leading parallel lives?

Do you feel like you and your spouse live in the same house, share the same bed, but have become nothing more than roommates?  You can stop the drift today.  Start looking your mate in the eyes. Start making physical contact. Start allowing them into your world and showing an interest in theirs.  Start —today.  Hit the reset and watch what happens!

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